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Has Gone Wrong With You??
By Jayne Leitch
Okay, you all asked for it. The MarySue absolutely NO ONE wants to read. (That give you enough warning???) Usual disclaimers apply. No archiving unless you get my okey-dokey.
There was the sound of a thousand pearly white doves of peace winging their way into the air, and there she was, in all of her dazzling beauty. She was thin, yet still curvaceous enough to provoke the most lurid of imaginings in whomsoever set eyes on her; her eyes, a sparkling, clear blue, gazed on him with the most intense, yet loving expression he had ever experienced beholding him. Her hair, softly curling, golden tresses of pure silk, shone captivatingly in the warm glow of a nearby street lamp, and he was overcome by an almost uncontrollable urge to reach out and run his fingers through its masses. Her mouth, a perfect, red cherry, smiled on him benevolently, and he watched, spellbound, as her full, luscious lips parted in a breath of exclamation before she leaned over to address him in a soft, melodious whisper. "I have been waiting forever to find you, my one, my only." Again, she blessed him with her smile, and he felt a rush of blood to his cheeks as he wondered at the likes of this woman -- a woman who spoke to him, so undeserving a creature, as if he were the finest king. "I wish only to spend my days and nights with you, throughout eternity, aiding you in your quest. Please, do not speak," she hushed his uncontrolled noise of wonder by placing a finely manicured finger over his lips, "Do not turn me away before I have had a chance to prove to you my undying devotion. For, you see," and suddenly, her eyes grew troubled, and seemed to reflect the pain in her very soul as she confided, "I would truly die if you were to cast me away." He looked at her, complete astonishment making him speechless. No one had ever spoken to him this way; no one had ever made him feel so completely spellbound just by their presence. He smiled at her, communicating that no, he would never dream of leaving her. Again, her eyes grew bright, and she continued, "My darling, I know your nightly search sometimes leaves you unsatisfied -- it shall never be so with me by your side. I can bring you your meals on a silver platter, if you would wish it, and you would never go hungry, because I would never allow it. And in our moments of solitude, when all feeding and liveliness is done, I would gladly tutor you in pronunciation, grammar, and hygiene. And not only this--" He blinked, amazed that she had anything else to give, "--But I also have a mysterious elixir for Hair Growth! My own invention, it will soon bring soft, glorious tresses to your head -- without all the mess and commitments of the Hair Club For Men." Screed swallowed thickly, gazing worshipfully at this woman, this stranger, who offered such exotic delights and sumptuous dinners. "Yew'll dew oll tha'?" he asked, his voice a choked whisper of adoration. "Oll tha' -- fer me?" "Of course, my love." The woman held out her hand, and Screed abandoned his almost-meal of White Lab Rat to take it and raise it to his lips. An' th' lady-bird dinna even shudder when Oi kissed 't! he wondered silently. Oi 'ave never felt such uhn 'traction tew anybodies! "But wait!" he said as she began to lead him back to his home. "Oi don't even know yer nomiker!" The woman looked over at him lustfully, then leaned close to his ear and whispered, "Call me whatever you wish, my sweet. I have no name other than what you bestow upon me. All others fall on deaf ears." The carouche's eyes sparkled as he considered the possibilities. "Cor..." As the pair walked blissfully away, their hands twined together in a lovers' knot that would never be broken, Screed knew that he was the luckiest man ever. He had found his soulmate, and her name was Natalie.
I had to!!! I had to!!! Before you kill me, I HAD TO!!!!!
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