(Bobby walks into rec room.)
Bobby: Whatever you two are doing, I don't want anything to do with it.
Anjela: Awwwww...c'mon..... (smiling) I'm not gonna do anything.
KSC: Pleeeeeeaaaaaaase!
Bobby: In that case...definitely NO!
(Bobby leaves rec room.)
Anjela: Great! Now how're we gonna get him over here?
KSC: I don't know, but I'm hungry.
Anjela: Now that ya mention it...what d'ya want?
KSC: Well...it's either something salty or sweet.
Anjela: That narrows it down a lot!
KSC: Well, what do you want?
Anjela: AAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGG!!!!! C'mon, anything that pops inta yer mind!
KSC: I hope not your claws!
Anjela: They will in a sec if ya don't think o' sumpthin'!
KSC: Uhhhhhh....pop....pop....corn! Yeh! Popcorn!
Anjela: (sighing) Finally!
KSC: Make sure it's that butter lovers stuff!
Anjela: Butter Lover's popcorn it is.
(Anjela telekinetically brings in two bags of popcorn, but not before Bobby sees them floating past.)
KSC: We can't eat unpopped popcorn! One of us is going to have to get up and nuke it.
Anjela: Uh...does the phrase 'pyrokinesis' strike a match fer ya?
KSC: But it's not safe to be too close to that bag bouncing around while it's popping.
Anjela: Is that all? I'll just use my TK ta keep it at a safe distance while it's popping.
KSC: Well, it's not like I'm used to being around people with super powers.
(The popcorn begins to pop as she creates fire around the TK suspended bag.)
Anjela: S'all right. Y'know...that stuff smells good!
KSC: Wish I could say the same, but I don't have enhanced senses and that TK thing around it is blocking the smell. Though, you know it's too bad it can't pop any faster...
(They both look at each other and smile as Anjela 'turns up the heat' on her fire. Suddenly, the contents begin popping rapidly until the bag blows up.)
KSC: (Jumping behind the couch.) Ahhhhhh!!!!!
Bobby: (Running into the room.) Who's attacking!?!
KSC: (Weakly from behind the couch.) I don't know, but tell me when it's over!
Anjela: Uh...nobody's attacking, but I now understand why it says 'overcooking may cause scorching' on the bag.
KSC: (Poking her head out from behind the couch.) Oh...
Anjela: It's a good thing I kept a TK bubble around the bag o' popcorn.
Bobby: Yeh. I sure ain't cleaning it up! (Leaves room.)
KSC: (Sitting back down on the couch.) Now what are we going to do? I can't eat scorched popcorn!
Anjela: Hey! It ain't that burnt!
KSC: If it was burnt any more, it would've disintegrated.
Anjela: Picky, picky, picky! Good thing I grabbed an extra bag fer me. We'll have ta share it. (TK holding the bag and heating it again.)
KSC: How 'bout you cook it at normal heat this time.
Anjela: Yer the one talkin' 'bout turnin' up the heat!
KSC: Well...how was I supposed to know? It's not like I ever popped popcorn without a microwave before.
Anjela: What's with you kids these days. Always counting on modern conveniences!
KSC: Well...I don't always, just when you're not around.
Anjela: Uh...huh...well, the popcorn's done. (Opens the bag.)
Bobby: (Walking in and sniffing the air.) Hey! Can I have some?
Anjela: Sure! Ya want regular or extra crispy?
Bobby: (Sitting down next to KSC.) I'm not even going to ask.
KSC: No more exploding bags, OK?
Anjela: Nag, nag, nag! I do what ya tell me an' this is the thanks I get!
KSC: Yeh...but, I thought you read the instructions.
Anjela: Do I have t'do everything?
KSC: Well...it's not like I can read a bag suspended in mid-air and surrounded by flames.
Bobby: Are you two done?
SNIKT
KSC & Bobby: Never mind.
SNAKT
Anjela: (Turning to Bobby and smiling.) Now that we got ya in here...
Bobby: Uh, oh... (Tries to get up, but can't.)
KSC: Ya wanna check out this cool sight or what?
Bobby: (Grinning.) 'Cool', huh?
Anjela: Keep yer powers to yerself, Robert.
Bobby: (Trying to get up again.) Speak for yourself! It's not like I can go anywhere, not when you're TK's keeping me glued to the seat!
KSC: Since you're not going anywhere...how about some sno-cones?
Anjela: I'll get the supplies, you just chill out.
Bobby: Ha, ha, very funny.
(After eating the sno-cones and unburnt popcorn.)
Bobby: Ya gonna let me go now?
Anjela: Sure...after you do a MST3K with us.
Bobby: There's always a catch.
KSC: You don't expect there to be any true deals out there.
Anjela: All ya have t'do is, I'll read the info and we make comments about it.
Bobby: I know what it is.
Anjela: Good! The sooner we start, the sooner we end, the sooner we let you go. Deal?
Bobby: Do I have a choice?
KSC: No. Do you ever when Anjie's involved?
Bobby: ...
Anjela: Good! Now that we understand each other, we can start!
Network opportunities Goes MLM.
Anjela: There's that mmm ul mmm thing again.
KSC: Mountain Lion Monuments?
Bobby: Mutant League Marathon?
Anjela: Not a bad start.
You can earn an unlimited income by sharing this simple program with others. 
Anjela: But I don't wanna share!
KSC: If we don't share, can we make more?
You simply sell 12 month subscriptions to this popular industry publication for $29.00
Anjela: What is this like Time or sumpthin'?
KSC: Popular Industry?
($39 in Canada
Anjela: Well duh.
KSC: How come?
Anjela: That's right, yer not from Canada.
KSC: No, but it's about Bobby's temperature.
Anjela: No, not exactly...oh, I'm not gonna argue with that. Speakin' o' Bobby, you can join in at any time.
and $54 in all other countries)
KSC: Other's a country?
Anjela: I didn't know they had the same monetary units.
and you receive a commission of $20 for every sale you make (starting with your 3rd sale)
Anjela: But what if we only wanna make 1 or 2 sales?
KSC: We don't get paid for the first two?
plus $20 every year that subscriber renews his/her subscription.
Anjela: Y'mean somebody's gonna wanna subscribe?
KSC: I know one person that would be stupid enough to. (Looks at Bobby.)
Bobby: What?!?
KSC: My point exactly.
Enroll other dealers and earn $20 for each of their first 2 subscription sales and each of their first 2 sales etc. for an unlimited number of generations.
Anjela: What is this like Gen. X, Y, and Z?
KSC: So somebody else gets paid for our first 2 subscriptions?
Bobby: (Looking confused.) Did any of you two get lost at the start of that sentence?
Anjela: We've learned to ignore things when they start to go over our heads.
KSC: Bobby's looooost iiiiin spaaaaaaam!
(Anjela & Bobby stare at KSC.)
Bobby: You're the one who brought her here.
KSC: You want to make something of it? Uh...Anjie??
Anjela: Out of the freezer, into the fire.
Commissions are paid weekly. 
Anjela: Woooo hoooo!
KSC: What's a commission? I want dollars!
Bobby: As I was saying.
Just 12 easy sales who each make 2 sales for only 5 generations pays you over $12,000.
KSC: Too many numbers! Anybody got a calculator?
Bobby: I'll get you one!
Anjela: Oh no you won't. 'Sides, what do you need a calculator for? You're the accounting major.
KSC: Yeh, think about all those comics we could buy!
Click here for an example!
Anjela: No, I'm gonna click someplace else?
Bobby: Just as long as it gets us off this site.
GET STARTED FOR AS LITTLE AS $39
Anjela: Enough shouting already! I can hear you!
KSC: I thought a subscription was only $29?
Bobby: Don't you mean $28.99?
KSC: Yeh! You always got to round down to the nearest penny.
If you're a US resident your total cost to become a NETWORK OPPORTUNITIES subscription dealer is just $29
KSC: I thought you said it was $39?
Anjela: There's always a catch y'know.
KSC: Yeh, we should catch all the lawyers and do something really nasty to them.
Anjela: Yeh! If they're female, we can make 'em go on a date with Bobby!
KSC: A fate worse than death!
Bobby: Well...if they're cute...
Anjela: I rest my case.
KSC: Forget it Bobby.
for your 12 month magazine subscription plus $10 for your dealer kit
KSC: We don't want a dealer in a kit.
which contains personalized camera ready ad slicks,
Anjela: Are those anything like oil slicks?
KSC: We don't want to be sleazy detectives.
Bobby: What's wrong with that?
Anjela: Only Bobby...
KSC: Remind me never to buy a camera for Bobby.
Anjela: Why would you buy him anything?
KSC: Good point.
Bobby: You know, I could just leave...
SNIKT
Bobby: Or maybe not...
SNAKT
KSC: I like it when you don't use those things on me.
Bobby: You mean I'm not the only one?
KSC: Unfortunately no. But Anjie, just remember that I'm the one sitting between the two of you.
Bobby: Hmmmm....good point...
KSC: You know, I could just move.
Bobby: You don't have to, I will.
Anjela: Both of you stay put so we can finish this thing!
 post card layout, flyers and more.
KSC: You let a postcard lay out?
Bobby: Talk about your 'hotmail'.
Anjela: Hot male? Speakin' o' which... (Ignites her thumb.)
Bobby: HEY! I thought you wanted me to join in?
Because of the additional postage cost Canadian residents pay a total of $49US
Anjela: Yeh, it ain't fair!
KSC: After all, we are on the same continent...I think...
Bobby: And they say there's problems with the education system these days.
KSC: (Turning to Anjela.) You mind?
Anjela: If you don't, I will.
SNIKT
Bobby: Now cut that out!!!
KSC: I wouldn't use those words if I were you.
Bobby: Good point....
SNAKT
and residents of all other countries pay a total of $64US.
KSC: US is a cash form?
Anjela: Maybe I shouldn't be so harsh 'bout the $49 thing.
KSC: Yeh, we're getting a better deal than Mexico.
All dealers also receive their own NETWORK OPPORTUNITIES web site just like this one. 
Anjela: Oooooo....good deal.
KSC: We don't want another one!
Bobby: What do you mean 'another one'?
KSC: We're looking at this one and I don't want them to multiply like Tribbles!!!
SNIKT
Bobby: At least that wasn't me this time.
KSC: But it's true!!! Can you imagine millions of these things??? They'd take over the internet!!!!!!!!!!
Anjela: (Growling.) Are you done Dr. Frankenstein?
KSC: (Weakly.) Yes...
SNAKT
In most cases your site will be set up within a few hours
Anjela: Oooooo...speedy delivery!
KSC: Any relation to Speedy Gonzalez?
Anjela: What's with the Mexican stuff?
KSC: It's Sinco de Mayo.
Bobby: Sink the mayo?
Anjela: (whispering to KSC.) He prob'ly thinks it's the running of the Chihuahuas or sumpthin'.
Bobby: It is?
Anjela: Bobby, I think you need to get out more...but not with me.
(unless we receive your application on a weekend or on a holiday). 
Anjela: Aaaaaand there's the catch!
KSC: But it's always a holiday in some part of the world.
Anjela: OK...BIG catch!
You can be in business and earning commissions virtually overnight!
KSC: Virtually means 'not really'. That clear enough for you, Bobby?
Bobby: I thought you were supposed to be making fun of this spam, not me!
KSC: Hey, whatever pops into my head.
Bobby: Yeh, that works well when you're sitting in a room with a telepath.
Anjela: Hey! I'm not in her head this time!
Our OPTIONAL $15 monthly turn key
KSC: If it's optional, I ain't paying.
Anjela: What do keys have to do with money?
Bobby: (Looking confused again.) I thought it was only $39?
enrollment system will also provide you with your own personalized Fax-On-Demand and voice mail recruiting system
Anjela: Oooooo....
KSC: Can I have a Noisy Cricket with that?
Bobby: What do you need a bug for?
Anjela: Haven't you even seen Men In Black yet?
KSC: He probably hasn't gotten a date yet...and no, I'm not available!
Anjela: *Good job on not leaving yerself open on that one.*
as well as access to our members area which provides online genealogy lookup,
Bobby: Jean-a-watzit?
KSC: You know, the stuff that makes us who we are.
Anjela: Just so you know, it's gene, not Jean.
Jean: (Walking in the rec room.) Did someone say my name?
Bobby: HELP! She's got me TK pinned to the couch!!!!
Jean: What did he do this time?
KSC: What hasn't he done?
Jean: Good point.
Bobby: Hey! Who's side are you on?
Anjela: Ours, or at least she will be after she goes to open the front door to her house and gets a bucket full o' ice water dumped on her head.
Bobby: HEY! How'd you...uh...I mean, w-what are you talking about?
KSC: She's a telepath, Bobby. They both are, give it up.
Jean: SO that explains why your mental blocks went up when I walked in.
Bobby: Aw man!
KSC: Busted!
Bobby: Does every telepath have it in for me?
KSC: Hey! I'm not a telepath, but it doesn't take one to tell you're up to something.
Anjela: So...what're you doing here Jean?
Jean: I was passing by and I smelled popcorn.
Anjela: I'd offer you some, but all we have left is extra crispy.
KSC: Anjela kinda turned it into charcoal.
Anjela: Well...what's the sense o' havin' pyrokinetic abilities if ya don't use 'em.
Bobby: To pop popcorn?
Anjela: Speakin' o' which, ya want me ta make ya some?
Jean: Uhhh...no, that's OK. I can make my own.
Anjela: Suit yerself.
(Suddenly, Jean had a shocked expression on her face like something bad happened.)
KSC: What happened!?!?! Is someone attacking?!?!?
(Jean runs out the door.)
Anjela: Uh...no...unless you count a soaking wet Scott coming to kill Bobby.
KSC: Run, Forest! Run!
Bobby: (Looking scared.) I can't! Anjela, let me go!!
Anjela: (Smiling.) Sorry, did you say something? I was listening to the death threats resonating in Scott's mind.
Bobby: HEEEEELLLLLLP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
KSC: Don't look at me! I'm just a human! I don't have any powers! Speaking of which...I think I'm going to get out of firing range, fast!
(Suddenly, Scott runs into the room.)
Bobby: AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M GONNA DIE!!!!!!! I'M TOO YOUNG AND GOOD LOOKING TO DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Seeing KSC, he aims at her.)
KSC: (Panicking) Hey! I'm not the one that put water above your door!!!
Scott: (Looking puzzled.) Water?
Bobby: (Calming down.) Uh...wait a minute, you're not wet...
(Jean walks in and she and Anjela start laughing.)
Scott: Somebody tell me what's going on?
Anjela: Ohhhhh....just a little payback. Just got outta hand when you came running in the door, but it did give it a nice touch.
Bobby: (Looking at Scott.) You mean you didn't get hit with the bucket of ice water above your doooooo....DOH!
Anjela: Open mouth, insert foot.
Scott: Oh...but who is that? (Pointing at the still panicking KSC.)
KSC: Uh....h-h-hi? I-I-I'm Kathrine Star Cairo.
Anjela: Yeh, she just 'popped' in from 'out-of-town'.
Scott: Oh. So, Bobby...can I have a word with you?
Bobby: Would if I could, but I'm kinda stuck. (He tries to get up when Anjela 'lets go' and he goes flying off the couch.)
Anjela: Well...we can finish this spam without you. Go on ahead, we won't mind.
Bobby: (Turns to Jean and weakly says) help...
Jean: You were the one who tried to dump ice water on me.
KSC: Hey, Jean. Care to join us?
Jean: I'd love to, but I'm going to be helping Bobby on his way and keeping him there.
Anjela: Oh...see ya in a few hours!
Bobby: noooooo.....
Anjela: (Smiling.) He's gonna think twice 'bout freezing the strings on my electric guitar fer awhile.
(Both sit back down.)
KSC: So...where were we?
free software, training and other Network Marketing resources.
Anjela: Free's cool.
KSC: I thought we had to pay for this stuff?
Anjela: Speakin' o' cool, ya want me ta link our minds with Bobby's so we can 'hear' him panicking?
KSC: You really want to go into Bobby's head?
Anjela: Good point.
Monthly subscribers also qualify for commissions and rebates on products and services purchased on our SuperMall. 
Anjela: What? A mall fer superheroes?
KSC: I don't know, ask Jubilee.
Detailed information about our OPTIONAL monthly plan will be included with your dealer kit
Anjela: Optional? They always get ya on the extras.
KSC: What? They're doing the budget for us?
Anjela: I think they'd quit after the 10th time the mansion blew up.
KSC: Don't mention the mansion blowing up!
which will also include information on how you can earn additional monthly income
Anjela: Wooo hooo! Money!
KSC: Is that free?
when people that you enroll into our magazine subscription program also participate in our OPTIONAL monthly plan.
Anjela: Awwww great! Nobody's gonna wanna do that!
KSC: Sure! There's a sucker born in every crowd, we just happen to know one.
Anjela: Yeh! An' right now, that sucker's gettin' chewed out by Scott.
(check out our SuperMall).
KSC: No thank you.
Anjela: Hey, I wonder if Jubilee wants a copy of that? Just one thing...I didn't know malls took checks, only charges...speakin' o' charges...how ya doin' Remy?
(Remy walks into the rec room.)
Remy: Is dat popcorn I smell?
KSC: Was popcorn, but we still have a slightly exploded bag left.
Anjela: Yeh, I kinda over-heated it.
Remy: (Smiling.) See chere, Gambit not de only one dat blows t'ings up.
Anjela: Yeh, yeh, yeh...sheesh! I make one little miscalculation...
KSC: Little? I thought someone blew up the place...again!
Remy: It wouldn't be de first time.
Anjela: What? Are you sayin' that I've blown up the mansion?!?
Remy: Not dat Gambit know. Have you?
SNIKT
Anjela: (She begins to growl and her eyes begin to glow red.) All I did was blow up a stupid bag o' popcorn!!!!!!!
Remy: You should relax, mon petit caracajou.
SNAKT
Anjela: (Calming down so that her eyes stopped glowing.) sorry...
KSC: Uh...English, please?
Anjela: He called me his 'little wolverine'.
KSC: Oh...so that's what that c-c-c-whatever thing meant.
Anjela: That's all fer French class today...now back to our regularly scheduled spam.
Remy: Gambit not even gonna ask. You two seen Rogue?
KSC: I don't have a clue.
Anjela: (Pausing a second.) Check the Danger Room, Remy.
Remy: T'anks, chere.
Anjela: See ya later!
KSC: See you in a fanfic sometime!
(Remy walks out with a puzzled look on his face.)
Anjela: Don't ask. Hmmm....I wonder if were ever gonna get this thing done?
KSC: That depends on if some bad guy comes crashing through the roof in the next 15 seconds.
Anjela: You seem a little paranoid today.
KSC: That's because around this place, that sort of thing is normal!
Anjela: So wha'cher point?
KSC: Let's just finish this thing before something happens.
Anjela: Whatever.
THE $10,000 BONUS MATRIX
KSC: Fancy printer.
Anjela: Bonus is always good.
As an added bonus all NETWORK OPPORTUNITIES Dealer/Subscribers will automatically be placed into our special 3x7 BONUS MATRIX. 
Anjela: Ow!
KSC: How are we going to fit into a printer?
Once you have 9 subscribers on your 2nd level
Anjela: Good night everybody!
KSC: I'm not bringing anybody into my home!
(with people that you enroll, people enrolled by those people, people enrolled by the company and others in your upline)
KSC: That's a lot of enrolling.
Anjela: Yeh, I guess they're really on a roll.
you will receive 2 free months in our optional monthly program (see above).
Anjela: If it's optional, I don't want it.
KSC: I don't pay for months now.
Fill your 3rd level with 27 subscribers and receive an additional 3 free months in our monthly program.
KSC: We're running a doggone hotel here.
Anjela: (Speaking with a Mexican accent.) Dog...gone? He ran away with the Chihuahuas to Taco Bell.
KSC: Uh...are...you OK?
Anjela: Huh? Oh...sorry, my mind was wandering.
KSC: In what dimension?
Anjela: The Twilight Zone! Doo, doo, doo, doooo, doo, doo, doo, dooo, doo, doo, doo, dooo...
KSC: WOW! It really exists??
Anjela: (Laughing.) Boy, are you gullible!
81 subscribers on your 4th level gets you a bonus check of $250. 243 subscribers on your 5th level and you receive a bonus check for $500.  When you fill the 6th level of your BONUS MATRIX you will receive a bonus check for $750.  When your 7th level is 50% filled you receive a bonus check for $5,000.  When your 7th level is completely filled you will receive a bonus check for an additional $5,000!
KSC: Even the Holiday Inn makes more than that!
Anjela: I'm proud of you! You're not brain fried after all them numbers.
KSC: What numbers? I got lost on the first sentence. Speaking of numbers, I wonder how Bobby's doing?
Anjela: What do numbers have to do with...oh, accounting...never mind. Speakin' o' mind, should I?
KSC: Well...popping onto Bobby's brain wouldn't be too bad...
Anjela: What brain?
KSC: Good point.
You must personally enroll 3 people in order to qualify for level 2, level 3 and level 4 BONUS MATRIX commissions.
Anjela: What is this? Like Mario Bros. or sumpthin'?
KSC: Too...many...numbers! Tylenol!
You must personally enroll 6 people in order to qualify for level 5, level 6 and level 7 BONUS MATRIX commissions.
Anjela: What's this? The bonus level?
KSC: Stop...numbers...please...must...stop?
Anjela: I think yer brain had a delayed reaction to all them numbers in the beginning o' this paragraph.
KSC: I don't know! You're the telepath.
Best viewed using Netscape 3.0 or higher
KSC: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A. Thomas is an independent representative of Ad-Net Inc..
KSC: Finally, no more numbers!
Automated scripts and self replicating code provided by:C.T.S.
KSC: There they go stealing the replicators again.
Anjela: Send in the clones!
© Copyright 1998 All Rights Reserved.
KSC: (Weakly.) stop........num...bers....
Anjela: Uh...I think I better 'port you home now.