Re: ~DONT BUG OUT
Only $5 wrote:
> This is interesting:
"Is not!"
"Jubilee! Give the, umm...figure time!"
> A little while back, I was browsing these news groups, just like you are now, and came
> across an article similar to this that said you could make thousands of dollars within weeks
> with only an initial investment of $5.00!
"Which means the jerk isn't even being ORIGONAL!"
"I think you spelled that wrong."
<bap!>
> So I thought,
"My God! It's thinking! Someone shoot it!"
> "Yeah, right, this must be a scam!" as most people probably thought. But also like most people
> I was curious, so I kept reading.
"_I_ however..."
"Jubilee!"
"Yeah, like you really believe him, Miss Angst."
> Anyway, it said that you send $1.00 to each of the 5 names and address stated in the article.
> You then place your own name and address in the list at #5, remove the #1 person, and move
> everyone up a position, and post the article in at least 200 news groups. (There are more than
> 18,000 of them). No catch, that was it.
"Hmmm, but what if you just put your name at the TOP?"
"M, you're giving them ideas..."
"Good ideas.."
"Jubilee, get away from that computer!"
"I'm gonna be rich!"
"_I_ think I'm going to skim the rest of this..."
> So after thinking it over, and talking to a few people first, I thought about trying it. I figured
> what do I have to lose except 5 stamps, envelopes, sheets of paper and $5.00, right?
"Your self respect?"
"Your email account?"
> Like most of us I was still a little skeptical and a little worried about the legal aspects of it all.
> So I checked it out with the US. Post Office (1-800-725-2161) and they confirmed that it is
> indeed legal.
"Yeah, that's right, everyone spam the post office...makes for _wonderful_ public realtions.."
"Now who's being Miss Angst?"
> Mail the 5 envelopes to the following addresses:
"You know, it worries me that only one Canadian fell for this, and the rest are all solid US citizins..."
"TWO of them are from Arlington, TX..."
> STEP 3: Change anything you need to, but try to keep this article as close to original as posible.
> Now, post you amended article to at least 250 news groups. All you need is 250, but remember
> the more you post, the more money you make! Don't know HOW to post in the newsgroups?
> Well do exactly the following:
"250!?!?!"
"My God, think of the SPAM."
"Great, M's gone catatonic again..."
> 2) Fill in the SUBJECT with a flashy title, like the one I used, something to catch the eye!!!!
"Flashy, like polyester suits..."
> 3) Now go to the message part of the box a retype this letter exactly as it is here, with the
> exception of your few changes. ( remember to add your name to #5 and move the rest up.)
"RETYPE it?? Why not just cut and paste??"
"Because this poor child has the brains of a well-baked potato..."
"Potatoe."
"I think I've had enough of this..."
"Just keep Jubilee away from the keyboard."
"M? Are you okay? M??"
Subject: [SPAMFIC] Re: Writers Seeking Publication
Tim@idt.net wrote:
> Now*accepting <new> and <previously published> writers for publication.
"Hey, that's us!"
"Down, Jubes, I hardly think acff counts as 'published'"
"Why don't they simply say they'll take anyone?"
"Yeah, they take new and old -- what's left?"
"Ummm, _good_ writers?"
> We are a NEW=YORK based international literary agency with three offices: 2 in NEW=YORK
> and one in <FLORIDA.>
"Oh, _that's_ international."
"Perhaps they meant interstate, or intranational."
"What they hell is intranational?"
> <Please follow guidelines for submission:>
> For ALL fiction, including screenplays for TV & Movies: Send us a <brief synopsis> , the first
> chapter, and include a self-addressed, stamped envelope=S.A.S.E.
"Finally! I can publish my memoirs."
"Someone get a rope!"
"Paige, Jubes, CALM DOWN!"
"Sheesh."
> Short Stories: Send brief synopsis, 3 pages, S.A.S.E.
> Poetry: Send 3 poems, S.A.S.E.
"I wonder if the Christmas poem counts..."
"Are you sure you _want_ that published?"
"Maybe not..."
"I hear Bishop is still trying to find those reindeer..."
> For ALL nonfiction: Send us a <brief synopsis> , the first chapter, and include a S.A.S.E.
"Send All Santa's Early?"
"So, Anyone Seen Elmo?"
"Sadly, A Sandwich Escaped"
"From _who_? Jubes just snarfed the last one..."
"Suddenly A Sound Escaped!"
"Hey! Put the coleslaw down!"
"I AM COLESLAW!!!"
"Help! Dex!!"
> Do not send complete manuscript unless invited.
> <WOODSIDE=INTERNATIONAL=LITERARY=AGENCY>
"Woodside = International = Literacy = Agency"
"I don't think this is a word puzzle, M..."
"Damn, she's gone catatonic again!"
"I thought I told you kids to keep M away from Spam!"
"Yes, Queenie."
> <Thirty Three Twenty Nine 58 St.>
"Hmmm, maybe it _is_ a word game..."
"I think we just lost Paige."
> <Wood-Side, New York>
> <zip: 1.1.3.7.7>
> <(Tel)=={718}=651=8145>
"A number! A number!"
"Hmmm, perhaps we ought to give it a call..."
"Collect of course."
"But don't save 55%!!"
"Yeah, then that cute detective will show up..."
"JUBES!!"
--==Click==--